in Shanghai… 🙂 😥
waaaaaayyyyy too many to write down on a blog.. but thinking about how when I move to HK, I want to become a better blogger/wordpresser. I think that the GFW of China really impedes me from writing and sharing my life… Facebook and Wechat have won me over for technological social means. 🙂 I am posting up photos from SH since the beginning of 2013 til now and so grateful for all the amazing memories with people here in Shanghai.
One question that was asked at Rhema Rise this past week was, “What hinders you from taking a step of f8th today?”
I think about this almost everyday, sometimes three to five times in a day.. knowing that the move is so soon.. makes me really wonder why it’s so hard to leave this beautiful city that has become home. Familiarity is something hard to leave. knowing the streets, knowing where to get things, knowing where my friends live, knowing my home, my roomies, my community.. knowing the familiarity is such a beautiful thing for me. I didn’t think this was so real until i face the reality of packing, saying farewell, having farewell parties, thinking and reminiscing with people about ALL that GD has done in us in this short time (compared to eternity) here on earth.
A couple months ago, (well sometimes every other dayish) I had a melt down… thoughts like “what are you doing? why are you moving? you have it so good? did you make a mistake? tell ykps you wanna stay?” it’s scary… but moving out of comfort and familiarity is maybe what Gd is asking of me… taking that step of f8th to know that reality is hard… that letting go of something good is a necessary part of life… we can’t get to the next level with Gd if we hold on to what it is that we dont want to let go of… whether how good it is.
“our reality is that we’re just passing through… open hands christine.” -bev
“we’re trading up… even if it doesn’t seem like it at the moment.” -pantz
To be honest, I know I have it really good. things are set for me and the Lrd has definitely paved the way… my heart still has issues.. but I guess this is part of the grieving/mourning of leaving… Gd is good and after my last trip to HK, I am more at peace that HK is where I am suppose to be.. but doesn’t necessarily make these next 30 days any more easier to say good bye…!
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.